Monday, August 18, 2008

i think you need to read this, andrea.

"chelsea cole " (11:01:26 PM): don't assume.
wexlackxamity (11:01:33 PM): hmm
wexlackxamity (11:01:34 PM): then idk
wexlackxamity (11:01:36 PM): but
wexlackxamity (11:01:46 PM): has she always disliked me and jsut refused to tell me ?
"chelsea cole " (11:03:14 PM): you need to stop assuming things, liz.
wexlackxamity (11:03:41 PM): can you explain that?
wexlackxamity (11:03:42 PM): like
wexlackxamity (11:03:53 PM): im 100% sure that was directed at me
"chelsea cole " (11:03:57 PM): you assume that they hate you.
wexlackxamity (11:04:08 PM): not they
wexlackxamity (11:04:11 PM): andrea
wexlackxamity (11:04:12 PM): not
wexlackxamity (11:04:14 PM): not hate me
wexlackxamity (11:04:15 PM): just
wexlackxamity (11:04:28 PM): how can you say you hope i get raped???
"chelsea cole " (11:04:47 PM): andrea is mad because you were rude to her on the phone last night/this morning.
wexlackxamity (11:05:00 PM): what?
wexlackxamity (11:05:03 PM): oh god
wexlackxamity (11:05:04 PM): how?
"chelsea cole " (11:05:09 PM): she told you to come home.
"chelsea cole " (11:05:09 PM): twice.
"chelsea cole " (11:05:19 PM): you're at andrea's, you follow her rules.
wexlackxamity (11:05:55 PM): i didnt know she actually cared, i thought she was asking me if i was going to or not! and i kept telling him i thought we should go and he took a while because we got stopped
wexlackxamity (11:06:11 PM): the second time she called i was on the way out of the house
wexlackxamity (11:06:32 PM): why cant she tell me this?
wexlackxamity (11:06:33 PM): i mean
wexlackxamity (11:06:35 PM): im not psychic
wexlackxamity (11:06:49 PM): she can tell me why shes mad, instead of trashing me on a public blog
"chelsea cole " (11:07:07 PM): she was being mean to you on the phone.
"chelsea cole " (11:07:09 PM): you just didn't notice.
wexlackxamity (11:07:15 PM): what did she say
wexlackxamity (11:07:16 PM): ?
"chelsea cole " (11:07:19 PM): hold on.
wexlackxamity (11:07:23 PM): okay
"chelsea cole " (11:09:55 PM): well.
"chelsea cole " (11:10:04 PM): she was like "it does not take you 20 minutes to walk from here to here."
wexlackxamity (11:10:09 PM): the only reason i didnt come home right away is because she didnt say she wanted me to, it was a miscommunication i guess. i took it the wrong way, obviously, and i didnt mean to piss her off or anything. and from what i remember from the phone conversation, i didnt notice because she talks to me like that all the time. so i suppose if thats what andrea being mean to me is, then shes mean to me quite often.
wexlackxamity (11:10:18 PM): what i got from it was
wexlackxamity (11:10:36 PM): are you coming home soon or are you staying out? not, you need to get home
"chelsea cole " (11:11:25 PM): not what she said.
wexlackxamity (11:11:32 PM): what DID she say then?
"chelsea cole " (11:11:39 PM): "where are you?"
"chelsea cole " (11:11:45 PM): "it's almost curfew."
"chelsea cole " (11:11:50 PM): "you need to get home soon."
"chelsea cole " (11:11:57 PM): "twenty minutes? okay."
"chelsea cole " (11:12:00 PM): second call.
wexlackxamity (11:12:01 PM): i did tell him i wanted to be back before curfew
"chelsea cole " (11:12:08 PM): "it's been twenty minutes."
"chelsea cole " (11:12:17 PM): "i don't care, get back now."
"chelsea cole " (11:12:26 PM): "it does not take this long to walk back!"
wexlackxamity (11:12:27 PM): i think i didnt have the phone to my ear because i didnt hear that
wexlackxamity (11:12:35 PM): i think dillon had the phone
wexlackxamity (11:13:04 PM): because if id heard that i wouldnt have done it the way i did
"chelsea cole " (11:13:22 PM): andrea thinks that you're going to get hurt with him.
wexlackxamity (11:13:25 PM): i know
wexlackxamity (11:13:34 PM): and from what i understand, she hopes i do
wexlackxamity (11:13:37 PM): what shes not getting though
wexlackxamity (11:13:46 PM): is that i have no emotional attachment to him
"chelsea cole " (11:13:55 PM): except.
wexlackxamity (11:13:59 PM): except?
"chelsea cole " (11:14:39 PM): why were you blushing when you two kissed?
"chelsea cole " (11:14:43 PM): why were you leaning on him?
wexlackxamity (11:14:49 PM): because he kissed me in front of all my friends!
"chelsea cole " (11:14:50 PM): why were you listening to music?
wexlackxamity (11:14:57 PM): because he was there, its a fling
wexlackxamity (11:15:02 PM): im not taking it seriously
wexlackxamity (11:15:05 PM): but its nice to be liked
wexlackxamity (11:15:21 PM): hes the first person since tom (i dont count john) to pay any attention to me
"chelsea cole " (11:15:36 PM): so you're trying to be the player when you're going to be played.
"chelsea cole " (11:15:40 PM): andrea's telling you to get out now.
wexlackxamity (11:15:40 PM): im not going to take it anywhere, its not like im going to have sex with him
"chelsea cole " (11:15:44 PM): um hi.
wexlackxamity (11:15:45 PM): hmm
"chelsea cole " (11:15:47 PM): um.
"chelsea cole " (11:15:48 PM): seriously.
wexlackxamity (11:15:49 PM): what?
"chelsea cole " (11:15:51 PM): it's dylan.
"chelsea cole " (11:15:54 PM): *dillon.
wexlackxamity (11:16:24 PM): i dont really know what to say
"chelsea cole " (11:16:40 PM): andrea is trying to protect you
"chelsea cole " (11:16:49 PM): she doesn't want you to get hurt.
"chelsea cole " (11:16:54 PM): by you not following her advice
"chelsea cole " (11:16:58 PM): it is a slap in the face.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:02 PM): you're telling her that she doesn't know
"chelsea cole " (11:17:05 PM): it's different
"chelsea cole " (11:17:08 PM): that it's just a fling
"chelsea cole " (11:17:12 PM): that it's for your enjoyment.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:16 PM): thing is.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:18 PM): it's not.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:20 PM): it's for him.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:33 PM): he wants something easy. he looked at you and pegged you for what you're not.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:43 PM): you were wearing shorts.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:44 PM): you're pretty.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:46 PM): skinny.
"chelsea cole " (11:17:51 PM): single.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:07 PM): you're going to get hurt in some way, she knows it, she tries to tell you, to help you, and you pretty much ignored her.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:14 PM): she cares for you and she shows it through protection and guidance.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:18 PM): i know what is right and what is wrong.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:28 PM): i won't say anything unless you people ask me.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:33 PM): i won't tell you what to do.
wexlackxamity (11:18:33 PM): i know, i know...youre right.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:43 PM): it's your life.
"chelsea cole " (11:18:45 PM): you figure it out.
wexlackxamity (11:18:52 PM): i hate this. i know im not doing the smartest thing
wexlackxamity (11:18:56 PM): shes right.
wexlackxamity (11:18:59 PM): its just really hard
wexlackxamity (11:19:17 PM): because its like im walking away from being...i dont know, cared for
wexlackxamity (11:19:21 PM): even though i know
wexlackxamity (11:19:26 PM): its not like that at all
wexlackxamity (11:19:27 PM): ldksjfdlskfjdsf
"chelsea cole " (11:19:32 PM): i did that to a boy.
"chelsea cole " (11:19:33 PM): twice.
wexlackxamity (11:19:45 PM): did what
wexlackxamity (11:19:45 PM): ?
"chelsea cole " (11:19:54 PM): wanted someone to tell me that they love me and care for me.
"chelsea cole " (11:20:00 PM): needed to have someone there because i was hurting.
wexlackxamity (11:20:13 PM): the thing is, i get the feeling andrea doesnt like me way too often for me to feel like she DOES care for me.
wexlackxamity (11:20:24 PM): because shes right, i dont belong
"chelsea cole " (11:20:50 PM): you are still figuring out who you are.
"chelsea cole " (11:20:53 PM): andrea has figured herself out.
"chelsea cole " (11:21:06 PM): so has katie.
"chelsea cole " (11:21:09 PM): i can pretend that i have.
wexlackxamity (11:21:59 PM): by "figured themselves out" what do you mean? because the only change ive seen lately in katie is the drug thing.
wexlackxamity (11:23:17 PM): i dont know. i feel like im trying to hold on to something thats not there anymore, because the truth is they dont treat me like a treasured friend or anything. they treat me like a child every time i say something that if anyone else said would be taken differently. i havent felt like they actually give a shit if they stay friends with me lately, like, at ALL. which, yeah, hurts/
wexlackxamity (11:25:47 PM): and of course, theres the whole every time im with them at the same time i am completely shut out and ignored
wexlackxamity (11:25:59 PM): which is why i left this afternoon, although today it was probably fully on purpose
"chelsea cole " (11:29:06 PM): they have themselves pegged for who they are and who they want to be.
"chelsea cole " (11:29:08 PM): they're not changing.
wexlackxamity (11:29:44 PM): so because im still figuring out who i want to be, i get treated like a child and excluded?
"chelsea cole " (11:30:08 PM): it's not that you're not a set personality.
"chelsea cole " (11:30:20 PM): it's the fact that you seem unwilling to accept the advice of others.
wexlackxamity (11:30:40 PM): accepting advice and following it are two completely different things
wexlackxamity (11:30:48 PM): and i do intend on following her advice, i really do
wexlackxamity (11:31:02 PM): it was just...today, i NEEDED that
"chelsea cole " (11:31:05 PM): good intentions and bad reflexes, right?
wexlackxamity (11:31:09 PM): yeah/
"chelsea cole " (11:31:25 PM): then i'm okay with what you're doing.
wexlackxamity (11:31:31 PM): thank you.
"chelsea cole " (11:31:56 PM): i would recommend telling andrea that you need someone right now, and he was the first to pop up.
"chelsea cole " (11:32:00 PM): that's how matt was for me.
"chelsea cole " (11:32:04 PM): it's why i'm all SDFL:KDSJ ALEX.
"chelsea cole " (11:32:08 PM): which i'm sure it gets annoying.
wexlackxamity (11:32:35 PM): thats exactly what it was
wexlackxamity (11:32:50 PM): ive been lonely since i got completely ditched in the beginning of july
wexlackxamity (11:32:51 PM): i mean
wexlackxamity (11:33:02 PM): i havent even had any one there to support me friendship wise
wexlackxamity (11:33:07 PM): and then bam, guy
wexlackxamity (11:33:22 PM): i just....i guess i needed something to balance myself on
"chelsea cole " (11:33:35 PM): yes.
"chelsea cole " (11:33:40 PM): keep him until you're balanced.
"chelsea cole " (11:33:53 PM): but don't let him get anything past a friend with benefits.
"chelsea cole " (11:33:56 PM): sounds bad.
"chelsea cole " (11:33:58 PM): trust me.
wexlackxamity (11:34:00 PM): i dont want to let him get past that
"chelsea cole " (11:34:07 PM): good intentions.
"chelsea cole " (11:34:10 PM): bad reflexes.
"chelsea cole " (11:34:34 PM): if he tries to hurt you i hurt him, though.
"chelsea cole " (11:34:38 PM): so.
wexlackxamity (11:34:40 PM): haha
wexlackxamity (11:34:46 PM): thats okay.

siamese twins.

katie and i are connected at the lung.


yeah, you heard me.

the lung.






word.